Mindful Communications..

What is Mindful Living??

Embracing Life..... Mindful Living.... Who gets to decide if I'm paying attention to my experiences.

What happens when we disagee,get angry, engage in office gossip letting mindfulness fly out the window.

Forgeting about the persons feelings dealing only with the problem with both of us wanting to be right about the other being insensitive.

I was faced with this experience just yesterday. I was in conflict with a friend and my living a mindful life was being challenged.

I reacted in several ways as his words floated around my ego...my emotions from past relationships and disappointments... and how I might be regarded in his eyes..


He acted as if he was right??... Did it matter if he questioned my integrity??

Do I NOW hold up the mirror in judgment attemting to discredit his actions..

After a 5 min game of who can push the reactive button the hardest doing the most damage. I remembered that no matter what I am responsible for my actions and choice of words when in communications.

I didn't want to be responsible for saying something in anger I would regret so I choose to simply tell the truth .. I would talk about this when I was less angry.

That was the most compassionate choice for both of us.

I asked myself why his questions made me angry...I knew my intentions were without
malice. I didn't need to defend myself.

So I choose to embrace this as information and choice based on his experience.

Not him judging me...And I know that I didn't intend to cause harm.


His angry words were not my truth.. So no need to respond back in anger..

Were my actions and behavior's grounded in compassion, empathy and love.. No not completely.

But I can say my actions were in the moment the very best they could be.. And the rest is just information.. NO RIGHT ....NO WRONG...NO JUDGMENTS....

Knowing that we both learned something about what's hurtful to the other. Which provides a deeper level of connection. And that conflict can be experienced without harshness.. Compassionate confrontation...

Means opening the door to caring for another in a gentle way even when you don't like the behavior,actions or situation.

Being willing to separate the action or behavior from the person. Knowing that it doesn't define either one of you... Staying in the relationship when it's not fun,exciting or rainbows... Being mindful to the knowing of what there heart holds..

Remembering those moments of the soul you have shared when words cant describe an experience you shared together.

Living in the knowing of what unconditional love really means.. A willingness to trust the relationship... More than taking the lead in the ego dance of being right.

BELOW IS A VERY PRACTICAL ARTICLE ON WHAT I CONSIDER MINDFUL




The Ingredients of Caring By Stephanie Peck


Humans are social creatures. We spend our lives interacting with others, giving and receiving. We were not designed to be alone, yet too often, when presented with the opportunity to reach out to another, we find ourselves holding back because we are unsure how to move forward. Whether we are caring for family or friends or complete strangers, we can act with assurance by breaking the concept of caring down into its essential parts.

• COMPASSION. The first step is having compassion for someone other than yourself. Too often, compassion is confused with pity, but they have completely different starting points. Pity is a fear-based response when we look down on someone else (as if into a pit) and treat that person as less than ourselves. We are so focused on the differences between us and them that we separate ourselves from them, holding them at arm’s length. Compassion, on the other hand, stems from the realization that we are all members of the same humanity and, therefore, equally merit love and concern. We are able to reach out to others (coming alongside them), look them in the eyes, and open ourselves to the opportunity to share life with another in all its joy or sorrow.

• ACCEPTANCE. We can only care for others if we accept them for the whole of who they are. We can’t pick and choose the parts we’ll help and disregard the rest. Acceptance doesn’t mean we compromise our beliefs. It gives us the responsibility to see without judging, to give without expecting repayment. When we can show every person we encounter the same acceptance, it is a reflection of the unconditional love we receive from God, who celebrates every one of us even when we’re not perfect.

• RESPECT. To treat another person with respect is to preserve dignity and nobility even when those things seem to be impossible. Every person is precious.


The pure and sweet souled
man
Mahatma Gandhi
commonly said,
"I am a Hindu and a Moslem,
a Christian and a Buddhist.”
In his ashram
at daily prayers,
Gandhi prayed
to include all faiths.
We too would benefit
greatly
from his lesson
in tolerance and participation.
Truly
the essence of
all religion is compassion.

Can we say:
I am a human being,
living here, in this time, in this
space, a citizen of the world;
an integral and engaged member
of this One
Earth Global Village.
I am a Hindu and a Moslem,
a Christian and a Buddhist,
a Pagan and a Jew.

I am one
with all compassion,
with all genuine love,
with authentic integrity,
for freedom for justice,
for peace and for honesty,
affirming dignity
protecting diversity
in nature and of cultures.

Wherever there is humility
and an open heart,
I am, in my soul.
Wherever there is kindness
and an open hand,
I am with these
unconditional hands
of flesh and life-giving energy.

I am food
and I am water.
I am air
and I am light.
I am many
and I am only one.
One
is the phenomenal power
of cosmic unity.